A Stroke of Luck (NC-17; Filch/Montague; 200 words): Mrs Norris finds a treat; Argus takes advantage.
Around midnight, Mrs Norris finished her evening spying round and meowed at Argus until he followed her deep into the dungeons.
"Now ye see, Montague," he said, licking his lips as he took in the delightful sight of the boy struggling in the arms of a suit of armour, "this is what comes of being out of bed after curfew."
"Get it off me!"
"I'm no wizard. I'll have to get Snape."
"No! Not him," Montague begged, crossing one leg over another in a futile attempt to cover his "third" one. "Anyone but him—please, just . . . just pry the damn thing off me!"
"You enchanted it to wank you, you horny bugger."
"So what if I did? Please, Mr Filch, just help me. I'll do anything if you help me."
Argus moved to stand before the boy and undid his trousers. "Anything?"
"Nice, good, yes—you just keep sucking," Argus said, taking hold of Montague's prick.
As he began stroking him hard and fast, Montague's suction increased, and soon, they were both grunting through orgasm.
"Good lad," Argus wheezed, pulling up his trousers.
"Where are you going?"
"Got to find a crowbar, don't I? You wait here," Argus said, laughing.